Sunday, March 13, 2016

My take on Love and Relantionships

I came upon this a true story about an elderly gentleman and a divorced lady who were neighbors. They lived alone. She rarely came out of her house. The man helped her break out of her cocoon. They began spending time together and people began making stories about them. The woman became so despondent that she decided to shift but the man stood by her side and to shut the people out they got married.  For most of us it might sound as a very strange relationship.  
The man had been a widower. His kids had grown and had a life of their own. He was experienced going through the harsh realities of life. The lady had been recently divorced and was in a dilemma about who she was and what was she going to do the rest of her life?  Being alone and then a lady she had already been marginalized. She considered herself the victim of the situation.  The answer to the question that what could be the reason behind their unique relationship is their loneliness. Both have been deprived thus, found solace in each other. The man cannot predict what lies ahead but he can certainly be there and make sure that she stands tall against all odds. He can guide her through his experience; make her used-to of her new lifestyle yet she’d have to find her own way.  He can provide realism to her unresolved prayers.
They don’t expect much off each other they’re just glad that they found a companion. The lady considers this man to be a savior in times of trouble when her own shadow deceived her; he was the one to rescue her from self destruction. The man considers the lady to be his last beacon of hope. They help survive each other. According to them their loneliness and mutual understanding gave rise to love and they were able to make a bold move as they tied the knot with one another.  This relationship can help both of them to evolve and confront their fears and the world.
Love is abstract and their can never be any explanations. According to my opinion love is a process, it breeds, it grows and get better with time. It isn’t important that one can always be right about it mostly what we consider ‘love’ is fancy imagination or infatuation.
As history goes ideologies have also been conflicted between the modern and the age old. The experienced members of the society always claim that a true relationship should be based on parental acceptance. But I believe that a foundation of every relationship is love because it covers all aspects needed between two people.
One thing that should be kept in mind that nothing works one sided. You have to see  that its two hands that claps rings.  Relationship is constant work so don’t give up and never get exhausted.  Human tendencies and their differences will not make them always agreeable. Resolve your differences and start on a blank slate. Learn from your experiences whether good or bad. Create a fine balance and eventually you will get it right as they say that there is always room for improvement.
Everything begins with a small talk. The more you talk the more you get comfortable around the person.  Don’t be afraid to get into arguments or fights. Communications should always be platonic. You should be able to confess anything and everything whether it is being unwilling to quit your job or lack of satisfaction during intimacy. Do not hesitate. Let’s remember this that one way or the other you are going to tell it someone so let that someone be that person whenever in doubt just ask yourself “will it be better if the person hears from you or from someone else?”
Two bodies’ one soul but it shouldn’t be two bodies congested and suffocating in one soul. Everyone should get their own share of appropriate privacy. For example a lawyer and a doctor were arguing who loves who the most the doctor said that I love you so much that I can get stars for you so the lawyer replied that if you love me so much that become a lawyer like me: we can understand that love is giving completeness to each other otherwise the relationship becomes lopsided but the instance right here is not a sacrifice rather a step towards a ruined future spent in an asylum. Love should be nurtured and shared; it shouldn’t become the reason for interference.
There is nothing perfect in this world. One can only aim for profundity. Spending quality time and actually paying attention to each other solves half the problem. Relationships never work on fickle and frivolous. You cannot get by relationships by using hit and try methods. It is a matter of choice so the decision should lie in your hands. You shouldn’t be influenced by anyone or anything.
Love is unbiased of everything and anything; it only commands self-dedication which comes through respect and modesty. It is an expression and one shouldn’t feel it for the sake of feeling it but accept it with sensibility and embrace it soulfully for once and for all.
Let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of heaven dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.- Khalil Gibran.



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