Each time I see the mirror,
A thick fog blankets it,
Nothing seems clearer.
I see everyone else,
I see them all,
Except for myself.
I see the scorching noon
And the raised brows
Of my uncles, aunts, cousins, and father
When they saw me combing a Barbie
And singing "pink is so my color."
My cheeks turn to tomatoes
When I recall
My mother beating me down
Because I stole her lipstick, her nail paint,
And dressed like a clown.
I nearly lose consciousness
Remembering the bullies
Pushing me to the corner,
Unable to race, wrestle, or kick,
Their favorite victim to pick.
I see eyes, countless eyes,
Eyes multiplying
On buses, planes, trains,
Mountains, beaches, and in rains,
Scanning and undressing
To my very veins.
I see hands, many hands,
Joining to form a band
To grope me, shame me down,
Every time they get a chance.
Now I hold a hammer and a wipe,
Capable of shattering it all,
Or wiping it clean,
But I do neither, and face it all.
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